Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Rainy Day in the Country
Oh, it's raining. When I work up the day was gray and cool. I hopped outside before the rain arrived to take some photos and let out my beasty demons. Then, back inside.... to work on my "illuminated" books and put some chicken soup in the slow cooker while the rain falls outside.
I've had a lot of thoughts lately. Thoughts on authenticity, fears, trusting the universe, acceptance and all these things jumble around in my head until I don't know which end is up.
Overall, it's been a huge and terrifying year. A year of changes, a year of endings and beginnings. And on top of it all....fears...fears of losing it all, fears of what these changes will bring, how I will change. My pregnancy is reaching it's end and this ending brings new beginnings.
I want to be open and accepting. I want to live fearlessly and confident, sharing the talents and gifts I've been given, offering these gifts for the good of myself, others and my community.
Working on my recent "illuminated" books have offered some respite. The idea of illuminated books, bringing in the light comforts me. Shutting out the world, listening to music, and methodically cutting and removing layers of text to add images and patterns. Creating art, something sacred out of something that would have been discarded, thrown out and forgotten. This process gives me a sense of completion, a sense of accomplishment and that everything will be alright, because someone is watching out for me.....just like I'm watching out for these old books and giving them new life.
So, how do you cope with overwhelming thoughts, feelings and fears? Do you burrow away into your work, write, etc? And what do you think of my "illuminated" books?